Mom passed away into the arms of the Lord last night at 11:45 pm. These are words I hoped not to have to write for a long time yet. Words I didn’t expect to write so suddenly. Just a few short weeks ago chemo ended. Just last Wednesday, hospice came in. And now, mom is gone.
I’m numb, bitter, angry, exhausted, and relieved all in one confusing tangle of emotions. Because how do you prepare for something like this? You see it on the horizon, but you never think that day will come. A wise friend of my family said it best. “Don’t put off doing something today because someday you’ll run out of somedays.”
It’s hard. Mom was suffering and deep down, we knew this day was coming. Cancer is cruel and devastating. It steals things you don’t even know can be stolen. It takes loved ones, it takes memories, it takes peace of mind, it takes moments, it takes and takes and takes and takes and only gives sorrow in return. We fought a war and lost. Four long years we fought this war, all for last night to be the outcome.
Mom went peacefully in the presence of family and leaves behind so many beautiful memories. Memories of growing up with a mother like her are part of the reason my sister and I are the women we are today. Her love of music especially was special. Mom was creative and passed that on to us both. We remember the fond days of playing video games with her, going on adventures, overall just enjoying life. These are things cancer will never be able to steal from us. It stole our mother, but not the memories we have of having her as our mother.
I’ll be stepping away from social media for a while to grieve and handle affairs here on the home front. That includes my writing and updates. I will return when I am able and wish you all the very best.
Time is valuable, folks. You never know when that someday will never come. We were fortunate to have the time we did with mom before the Lord called her home to be with Him. Don’t put off making that phone call, writing that letter, visiting that person. Life is too valuable to let slip by.
- Ryn
